Anyway, since I can’t hear Ms. Brown talk, I do a lot of visual deconstruction of her show (CNN recently changed their graphics!), and I’ve started to notice that she is perpetually on a lean. It’s like there’s a permanent crick in her neck.

I tell you what probably really happened: She wanted to look “down to earth” and “casual” to her No Bias, No Bull viewers and adopted a semi-slouch look. Instead, I always find myself leaning my head so I’m somewhat crooked in order to make her look straight. Check it out:

CNN's Campbell Brown seems to always be on a tilt

See what I’m talking about? Don’t worry; I have more proof, complete with technical drawings:

Exhibit 1

Exhibit 2

Exhibit 3

Exhibit 4

Anyway, I love you, Campbell, but I’m glad your tilt hasn’t caused me to tumble off the treadmill yet, but I’ll be damned if it does. Campbell Brown, 1; Me, 0.

I don’t know if you’ve seen it or not; I’m not too sure of where it’s played or if it’s just a regional thing. However, there are a number of reasons this commercial is awesome:

• The browser URL at 0:17 seconds reads: “http://www.email.com/email.htm/”, a veritably impossible address
• The impossibly generic instant messaging program at 0:14
• The fact that the program doesn’t work for Macs (0:28), but all the computers in the shots are Macs (example at 0:07)

But the best part of the whole thing occurs before you realize the commercial’s barely been going on. Go back and watch the video and see if you see anything funny in the first 15 seconds. Try right at 0:12 seconds. Check it out in high quality. Still can’t see it? Don’t worry; we DVRed it at home and then took a screen shot for you (click on it for full-size):

A FinallyFast.com commercial screenshot

They’ve written out common fairy tales there in each paragraph (Little Red Riding Hood, Alice in Wonderland, and the Hunchback of Notre Dame), but the best part comes at the end of the Alice in Wonderland story in the second paragraph. Here is the text, verbatim:

They stood at the tail gate—Alice approached the men. “Hello,” said Alice. “Sorry kid,” said the taller man, “you can’t leave Wonderland. This area is quarantined with Sars.“

And why not? If I’m going to Wonderland, I’m sure as heck not leaving to the real world to get Sars!

A note about the rules: These are chosen based solely on usage of gibberish alone. Therefore, songs where the gibberish is mixed with actual English words are thrown out, e.g. The Police’s De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da.

1. Crash Test Dummies—Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

   By naming this song they effectively made every Top 40 DJ’s life a nightmare. I remember hearing it for the first time, enjoying the melody like every good mid-’90s kid would, and wondering what the name of it was so I could go (*shudder*) buy a CD. I wouldn’t have believed it except for the fact that the song was about a girl who wouldn’t change in the girls’ dressing room because she had birthmarks “all over her body.”

   Crash Test Dummies—Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

   [audio:ctdmmm.mp3]

2. Hanson—MmmBop

   I suppose the “mmm” sound is made enough to warrant two incredibly addicting melodies. Don’t knock Hanson. To me they’re kinda like the band you had to hate but secretly listened to when the song came on in the car and ten years later it’s cool similar to Paula Abdul’s “Straight Up”.

   Hanson—MmmBop

   [audio:mmmbop.mp3]

3. Third Eye Blind—Semi-Charmed Life

   This may be the biggest stretch on the list, but I’ll be damned if I’m not walking around singing “doot doot doot” every time I hear this song.

   Third Eye Blind—Semi-Charmed Life

   [audio:3eb.mp3]

4. The Marcels—Blue Moon

   This one was almost too easy. I can’t even remember the first time I heard this song (although I’m going to venture to say it was when I was in the car with my mom when I was young and the only thing she let us listen to was either Christian music or oldies. Which in my opinion is kind of funny because some of those oldies songs had some inappropriate material in it) but, just like every one of you, I tried to sing it back and screwed it up majorly.

   The Marcels—Blue Moon

   [audio:bluemoon.mp3]

5. Tokens—The Lion Sleeps Tonight

   I don’t know who wrote it, and I don’t particularly care. All I know is that this song, while atop this list, also tops the “Easiest to Get in Your Head” list.

   Tokens—The Lion Sleeps Tonight

   [audio:tokens.mp3]

What are YOUR favorites?

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/12/12/top-5-best-songs-with-melodies-that-arent-words/feed/ 10 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/23/new-blog-coming-soon/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/23/new-blog-coming-soon/#comments Sun, 23 Nov 2008 21:21:16 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=464 I know I’ve been a little absent lately, and for that, I apologize. However, I wanted to just drop a quick note saying I’ve been working on a re-design and that’s been the reason for the hiatus. However, that being said, I’m going to drop some other things that’ve been on my mind:
• Texas idle, Tech loses, Oklahoma, despite losing to Texas, jumps in AP poll. Still, Texas remains #1 in Sagarin ratings.
• Found out from my roommate that if you burn a Taco Bell straw, it burns differently than a regular straw. It’ll catch fire, burn down and basically implode on itself. Try it. In a safe place, of course.
• Watched an episode of SNL with my brother and roommate. It was the one with Beyonce and Paul Rudd. Just so happened to have one of the most hilarious skits I’ve seen in a long time, the one where Justin Timberlake, Andy Samberg, and Bobby Moynihan dress up as Beyonce’s back-up dancers. We watched her live performance too. (Here’s the original video.) But my puppy Bentley was so inspired that he wrote his own version and made a music video out of it.
]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/23/new-blog-coming-soon/feed/ 2 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/10/mustaches-for-kids-i-grow-the-stache-for-charity/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/10/mustaches-for-kids-i-grow-the-stache-for-charity/#comments Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:10:25 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=451 It’s always been a dream of mine to grow a full-on mustache. However, these days, if you’re a mid-’20s young adult and you start to grow one you’re all of a sudden a pedophile.

It only makes sense that I start to grow one for the kids.

Mustache for Kids is a national organization in which participants grow a mustache for one month while raising money for charity. You look like a fool for one month while people give money in your name to charity… to look like a fool. And all the while I have an excuse to grow a mustache. There are even rules!

Support me!

I’m begging you all: Please donate! It’s fairly simple: visit my donor page (every Mustache for Kids grower across the nation sets one up), and scroll down until you see the charity I’ve chosen to support. Put in an amount (ANY amount helps!!) and hit Give. That’s it!

Seriously, even $1 is a step closer to the goal!

You’ll be happy to know I never see any of the money. I don’t want to see it. I want you all to know that every amount you give goes directly to the kids. That’s that! And every donation is tax deductible.

The Links

• The Official Mustache for Kids Organization
• The Houston Chapter of Mustache for Kids
• The David Stagg Giving Page

Great Mustaches in History

My personal favorites

1. Adam Morrison

   

   Almost like his buddies at Gonzaga dared him to do it because they knew he’d be seen in the NCAA tournament, he grew a measley ’stache that did nothing but entrance the public. “Why?” they asked. I never questioned. Only relished. Photo courtesy of BrashMoustache.com

2. Freddie Mercury

   

   Not only is he quite possibly the greatest songwriter and performer in the history of rock music, he definitely realized that a mustache was the way to go. If I could only channel his ability to write a song through growing a ’stache, call me Lennon/McCartney. Or the Jonas Brothers. Photo courtesy of HearYa.com

3. Rod Beck

   

   This guy died of a cocaine overdose. He had one of the craziest fastballs in MLB history. We had the honor of watching him growing up (I’m sure my dad will be able to expand on him) and we were trained to hate him. But I’ll be damned if that isn’t one of the greatest mustaches of all-time.

Case Study



Jason Giambi. You can witness his ’stache at right. Here is a guy who was publicly hated by baseball fans because of his admitted use of performance enhancing drugs. He sits on the Yankees roster making $20 million plus a year despite being hurt AND being a cheater. His career isn’t stellar. He’s a wash—totally mediocre. Arguably, that’s worse than being hated in baseball.

Enter the ’stache. Immediately, as it makes it’s debut, fans begin to rally around it. It’s so Burt Reynolds, people start to emulate it. They begin to wear fake mustaches to games. Yankee Stadium starts showing “Support the Stache” graphics during games. His numbers start to improve:

Giambi had sprouted the hair as a way to shake up his season after hitting .164 with five home runs and 13 RBIs in the month of April. The hits started to come and Giambi decided the mustache would have to stay, batting .309 with 12 home runs and 33 RBIs in May and June combined.

—MLB.com

Next thing you know—no one remembers anymore. He’s absolved of his crimes.

That’s the power of the ’stache.

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/10/mustaches-for-kids-i-grow-the-stache-for-charity/feed/ 2 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/05/the-easter-egg-on-barack-obamas-web-site/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/05/the-easter-egg-on-barack-obamas-web-site/#comments Wed, 05 Nov 2008 14:55:44 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=446 In honor of Obama’s win (and before you jump to conclusions, this is by no means a political post or designed to show my support for a candidate), as a designer, I’ve been to his Web site a number of times. It’s an incredibly good piece of work. His campaign will already go down in history as one of the greatest of all time, and his Web site furthered that vision.

But since I’m a designer, not a marketer or a politician, I was checking out the way his site was built a while back and found this really cool easter egg on his site.

Screenshot from Yesterday:

(Click for full-size)



Looks like a standard Web site. But a lot of Web designers use background images to make things look the way they do. It’s like taking a canvas and painting the whole thing black before you starting putting actual content on the canvas.

The Easer Egg

Well, Obama’s Web site used a fairly large background image to frame the look of his site, but there was a little love note left behind from one of the designers. Here’s a shot of the background image (click for full size):



You would have never seen that incredible eagle back there unless you went to view the background image. It’s an impressive design, and it’s hidden to almost 90% of the people that view his site. I think it’s incredible.

How to View a Background Image

For those of you who have absolutely no idea what I’m talking about, you can view background images yourself. If you want to see what kind of background images are lurking out there, it’s really easy to do:

1. These instructions only apply to the Firefox browser.
2. With your mouse, hover over over the area on the screen where you’d like to see the background image.
3. Right-click.
4. Select “View Background Image.”
5. And that’s it! It will show up in your browser.

There are other ways to view the images in other browsers, but this is the simplest. I can’t say I’ve seen a ton of easter eggs like this one, but if you want to check out some ways that sites are built, it’s an incredibly useful tool.

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/11/05/the-easter-egg-on-barack-obamas-web-site/feed/ 1 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/22/top-5-video-games-i-spent-more-time-on-than-i-care-to-admit/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/22/top-5-video-games-i-spent-more-time-on-than-i-care-to-admit/#comments Thu, 23 Oct 2008 03:42:07 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=421

The Legend of Zelda

These are the types of video games when you realize after you’ve spent four consecutive hours on the couch without moving that you need to get up and do something else. The types where you probable thought, “I would have been better off if I had never purchased this game,” and then promptly smack yourself for ever thinking about living in a world without them.

Yes, these are the Top 5 Games I’ve spent an ungodly amount of time playing—and would probably never admit how long, nor really want to know.

PS – BTW, these are in inverse order. So although it says #1 just below this paragraph, it’s actually #5.

PPS – I also cheated and put six games in a Top 5 list. I know. It’s wrong.

1. The Legend of Zelda

   This is the original we’re talking about here. I’m sure this is much higher for most everyone else who plays video games though; it was revolutionary in that while Super Mario Bros. had you bouncing around smashing goombas and stuff, Zelda had you moving and thinking like you were actually saving a real-life princess. There was strategy. There was a sweet sword. And just like any true boy, you just keep on playing until you got the hot princess.

   Soundtrack to this Game

   The theme to Zelda:

   [audio:zeldatheme.mp3]

2. MLB: The Show 2008

   The most recent addition, I must admit that I probably played this one more than most people because it was my first foray into the PlayStation3. Either way, when you can create your own player, make it look like you, start out as a minor leaguer, and then work your way to back-to-back Cy Young awards and a World Series title? Yeah, count me in. (As if my bias towards my love of baseball didn’t influence the direct amount of time I played this game.)

   Soundtrack to this Game

   As games got newer, they’ve stopped writing theme music to video games; they just license songs out and make straight cash. So for this one, and a couple later ones, these are songs from the soundtrack to the game.

   ZZ Top—I’m Bad, I’m Nationwide

   [audio:zztop.mp3]

3. MegaMan 3

   This is kind of a tricky one. MegaMan 3 wasn’t actually a tough game; the tough games usually waste the most time because you can’t beat them right off the bar. But this one is up here because I’ve replayed an insane amount of times. Not to mention, it has some of the best theme music in the history of video games. Segue…

   Soundtrack to this Game

   Theme to MegaMan 3

   [audio:mm3.mp3]

4. Tony Hawk 3

   The thing that made this game so great and time-wasting was the playability. You could get a seemingly infinite amount of points as long as you keep your nollie rolling. And then when you got bored, go ahead and throw in some codes and end up on the moon and spin forever.

   Soundtrack to this Game

   CKY made a huge splash here before Bam Margera was pimpin’ them out. Bodyjar’s “Not the Same” is also awesome, go check it out.

   CKY—96 Quite Bitter Beings

   [audio:bitterbeings.mp3]

5. Guitar Hero 3

   The thing about Guitar Hero is that you have four different levels to play on. So right when you get done beating the game and blistering your fingers on medium, you’re start in on hard and expert feels unattainable. But when it’s that unattainable, just like the hot cheerleader in high school, you just keep on going, keep on trying until you get there. I’ve still never beaten “Raining Blood” by Slayer on Expert.

   Sountrack to this Game

   Slayer—Raining Blood

   [audio:blood.mp3]

6. Dr. Mario

   Rather than tell you about this game and how many hours I’ve spent playing it (which, honestly, probably amounts to almost 30 days straight), I’m going to tell you an anecdote about what happened in my life during the playing of this game. I first learned about it from my buddy Kyle. I didn’t have a car in high school when I was a freshman or sophomore, so he would take me home when we got out. Sometimes, instead of going right home, we would go to his house instead to hang out. Eventually, we started to listen to music, kind of mindlessly, while we played. This turned into us only listening to one CD: Ace of Base’s The Sign.

   Soundtrack to this Game

   Theme to Dr. Mario

   [audio:drmario.mp3]

Honorable Mentions

I wouldn’t be doing this list justice if I didn’t mention the following:

• Halo—Only Halo 1, though. I was in college. Lots of long nights trying to illegally connect to an Xbox server and get people to j-up and play.
• The Oregon Trail—I don’t know if this one counts, but it was the number one game I’ve ever played while in a school setting.
• NCAA Football 2003—Joey Harrington was on the cover. That shows you how long ago that was… and how mis-covered it was.

Happy gaming!

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/22/top-5-video-games-i-spent-more-time-on-than-i-care-to-admit/feed/ 6 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/09/fedex-provides-me-with-the-biggest-revelation-ive-had-in-a-long-time/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/09/fedex-provides-me-with-the-biggest-revelation-ive-had-in-a-long-time/#comments Fri, 10 Oct 2008 02:34:49 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=414 Alright, everyone’s seen the FedEx logo. I know you have. It’s almost as ubiquitous as Coke or the golden arches. And just as a reminder, here you go:



Normal, right? Not so. Never was. Best design “easter egg” ever. I’ve got to give credit to BadAssIdeas.com for opening my eyes:



That picture is from their site, so I have to give credit where credit is due. I’ve never seen that arrow before in my life. I feel like such a fool and now I can’t stop staring at it. Way to go, Landor Associates.

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/09/fedex-provides-me-with-the-biggest-revelation-ive-had-in-a-long-time/feed/ 5 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/06/twenty-five-days-of-horror-movies/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/06/twenty-five-days-of-horror-movies/#comments Mon, 06 Oct 2008 23:21:51 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=380 If you know me at all, you’ll know I absolutely love horror/scary/suspense/thriller movies. The campier, the better. Much to my mother’s dismay, I still watch them all the time, originally went to school to make them, and am one of the few people who saw Black Christmas and liked it.

This love for horror movies has obviously trickled over into a love for Halloween. Ghouls and ghosts and zombies and freaks-coming-out-at-night… Love it. So this year, in honor of Halloween, my roommates and I are officially announcing 25 Days of Horror, our toast to the crazy month of October.

The Official 25 Days Schedule

Please note the theme nights of the week: Mondays are Camp movies, Wednesdays are Zombie movies, Fridays are The Best Movie You’ve Never Seen movies.

All movies will begin between 10-10:30 p.m. unless otherwise noted.

1. Oct. 6

   Sleepaway Camp

2. Oct. 7

   Army of Darkness

   This one wasn’t originally planned, but when we got home this night and scoured our house, we couldn’t find the DVD. It will be bought and watched in place of the re-make of the same movie.

3. Oct. 8

   Shaun of the Dead

4. Oct. 9

   Suprise night!

5. Oct. 10

   Death Bed

   Death Bed trailer

6. Oct. 11

   Carrie

7. Oct. 12

   Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

8. Oct. 13

   Friday the 13th

9. Oct. 14

   Hostel

10. Oct. 15

    Zombie Strippers

11. Oct. 16

    The Exorcist

12. Oct. 17

    Creepshow

13. Oct. 18

    Final Destination 2

14. Oct. 19

    The Brood

15. Oct. 20

    Cheerleader Camp (1987)

16. Oct. 21

    The Ring

17. Oct. 22

    Dead Alive

18. Oct. 23

    House of 1000 Corpses

19. Oct. 24

    Suspiria

20. Oct. 25

    Children of the Corn

21. Oct. 26

    Nightmare on Elm Street

22. Oct. 27

    Child’s Play 3

23. Oct. 28

    Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows

24. Oct. 29

    Evil Dead

25. Oct. 30

    Halloween

Come on down!

We are more than happy to have guests attend. You see a movie on there you’ve wanted to see but don’t own? Give one of us a call and we’ll let you know the details!! Come celebrate the month with us.

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/06/twenty-five-days-of-horror-movies/feed/ 6 http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/04/reasons-why-according-to-ice-cube-that-i-should-be-having-a-good-day/ http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/04/reasons-why-according-to-ice-cube-that-i-should-be-having-a-good-day/#comments Sat, 04 Oct 2008 19:04:51 +0000 David http://www.davidstagg.com/?p=287 If Ice Cube were a motivational speaker (motivational rapper?), he would already have a good foundation to go on. Circa 1990, he already gave us a number of reasons to have a good day:

Ice Cube – It Was A Good Day

[audio:itwasagoodday.mp3]

1. He woke up that morning
2. The dogs that typically bark in the morning were not
3. There was no smog, despite the fact that it’s Los Angeles
4. His mother cooked his breakfast before he was awake, and it didn’t have any type of pork product
5. While eating, he received a call from a girl he’s been into lately and set up a date
6. He’s got a convertible automobile that, when activated, can utilize a hydrolic system to make the back end of the car physically drop
7. At a red light, he couldn’t see any police cars
8. He was just beeped—an antiquated, primitive version of texting—from Kim who is capable of having sex for multiple hours
9. He found out that his friends were playing basketball
10. When he began playing with them, he was having a repeat performance of last week’s triple double
11. He went back home from the game to take a shower, and on the way, no way chastized him, despite the fact that last week they heckled him
12. As he ran a red light, he saw the police who weren’t looking at him allowing him to get away with the minor law-breaking
13. After showering, he went to Short Dog’s house to watch Yo! MTV Raps and to gamble on craps
14. He continued to do very well at the game, rollling 7s and 11s, before winning the pot and moving on to dominoes, which he also won
15. No one that he knew was murdered in his neighborhood
16. He finally got to pick up Kim, which is a great thing, because he’s been trying to have intercourse with her ever since he was a senior in high school
17. Serendipitously, she had alcohol and he had marijuana so they weren’t stuck with too much of one and not enough of the other
18. The home team Los Angeles Lakers beat the powerhouse Seattle SuperSonics
19. He was able to have sexual intercourse
20. When he had to leave, he had to wake her up to take her home, and she referred to him as the “Top Gun”
21. Although he was drinking and driving, he was able to utilize his hydrolic system again to drive on only three of the four wheels of his car, a way of showing off in your car
22. As he was thinking about how good the day was—similar to a dream—he also realized he hadn’t seen any policemen
23. There was no helicopter in the air, allowing him to feel a little relief there were no murders late at night
24. At 2 a.m., he was still able to purchase and consume an above-average sized hamburger
25. It was a clear night (no smog, remember!) so he was able to see the Goodyear Blimp—and despite the owner not knowing him—they still had it scrolling: “Ice Cube’s a pimp”
26. He was severely intoxicated, but wasn’t regurgitating
27. Even though it’s late at night and he’s almost home, he is still being beeped by multiple people, hoping he’ll continute to stay out that evening
28. He didn’t have to use Kalashnikov’s automatic rifle model of 1947 in a gunfight

Count your blessings! I’ve got to say it was a good day.

]]> http://www.davidstagg.com/v2/2008/10/04/reasons-why-according-to-ice-cube-that-i-should-be-having-a-good-day/feed/ 1